Preparing your child for a new baby: a gentle guide for parents
A new baby is wonderful news, and a big change for the child who was there first. These small steps can help them feel included, important and loved through the transition.
Talk about it in their language
Use simple, concrete words: the baby will be small, will cry, will sleep a lot and can't play yet. Answer their questions honestly, even the funny ones.
Read stories about new babies
Stories give children a safe way to rehearse big feelings. A story where they are the big brother or sister, like Hikaya's new-sibling story, lets them see themselves in the role before it begins. See stories for a growing family.
Give them a real job
Fetching a nappy, choosing the baby's outfit or singing to them. Small jobs make an older child feel needed rather than replaced.
Keep their routines steady
Bedtime, the morning walk, the favourite breakfast. When everything else changes, familiar routines are reassuring.
A gift "from the baby"
Many families give the older child a present from the new baby on the first meeting. It starts their relationship with something warm.
Protect one-on-one time
Even ten minutes a day of undivided attention, without the baby, tells them they still have their own place with you.
Expect a few wobbles
Some children go back to baby talk or want to be carried again. It's a common way of asking for reassurance, and it usually passes with patience and extra cuddles.
A tip for visitors
Ask friends and family to greet the older child first, before the baby. It is a small thing that means a lot.